Family and friends

.
While most of us appreciate spending time with our families ~ especially during holidays ~ it does seem to carry with it some ‘mixed feelings’... again, for most of us...
On average those ‘mixed feelings’ are quite innocent; like ‘I hope uncle will not start telling those old jokes again ~ like he does every year’.

There are also instances when this dedicated family-time brings out grumbles and grudges that sometimes have been simmering for years. And every time in the past there may have been a consensus to not talk about ‘those things’ ~ until finally that time arrives  when it is brought up. And hardly ever is the issue itself brought to the table ~ more often than not it starts off with something like: ‘But you always - - - Remember 15 years ago when - - -’
And there you have it. What started as a nice family dinner may end with heated arguments.

Interestingly enough we are far more willing to talk about things that have happened of which we perhaps didn’t like how others reacted to ~ if those others are friends... And if we decide we are not going to bring it up, this may be because in the grand scheme of things it wasn’t all that important ~ or because it has cause damage beyond repair to the friendship, and we allow the ‘friend’ in question to drop out of our lives. We ‘unfriend’ them.

Friends are those we have chosen to build a friendship with, and we can choose to end that friendship if there is a reason that is important enough to do so.

Family is different.
We are born into a family. And while ~ from a spiritual perspective ~ we have likely chosen our parents; this is not necessarily the case for the other members of our family: our aunts, uncles, etc. And we certainly haven’t chosen the partners of our siblings ~ and rightfully so!
So if we bring the whole family together, it would be normal that there would be some family members you like and get along with great ~ while other members of the family don’t resonate with you quite as much ~ or in some cases not at all...

The fact that they are family is no guarantee for getting along with them ~ or for them to get along with you. And while this is something that we might readily accept as being the case when we are talking about co-workers or fellow students ~ when we are talking about family members it is different. It seems we somehow expect to all get along, to all enjoy the same things ~ and even when we don’t, to be gracious enough to let it be.
.
.