Demands

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Most of us react a lot better to a request than to a demand.
And while we may accept a demand from an authority figure ~ for instance a parent when we were still a child, or a police officer, or our boss ~ we have a tendency to not take overly kindly to a situation where  something is demanded from us. Especially when the demand seems outlandish. Either because of what it is that is being asked of us, or because of the person who dares ask it of us...

This also means that the person demanding something from us ~ whether it is an answer, a solution to a (perceived) problem, or even a certain code of behavior ~ often will have to do something ‘extra’ to make us pay attention. To motivate us to react; to take action.

A very effective way to make this happen used to be through the use of guilt.
If they would succeed to make us feel guilty about not answering, not reacting, or not taking action ~ chances are that even when we thought the demand was outlandish, we’d still engage and comply.

The principle of using guilt as a tool ~ guilt-tripping ~ is simple. It appeals to some aspect of you that you would like to bring out, yet are still uncertain of. And then denies that very aspect aspect of you. For instance, if you consider yourself a helpful person, the guilt-trip would be something like: “But you are never helping me when I ask for your help.”
The interesting thing is, that whether this is true or not (and chances are it is not true), we still feel that instant pang of guilt that will prompt us to spring into action.

There is hardly any logic to it as our emotions function outside of logic on a more inner, even subconscious level.

This also means that the more aware we become, the sooner we know or feel what is happening when someone is guilt-tripping us. The better we understand ourselves, the more we love ourselves ~ the harder it gets for someone to lay a guilt-trip upon us...
Because we sense what is happening before we jump into guilt induced action.

And that gives us even more choices as to how to react when someone is demanding something from us.
We may choose to be kind and help out ~ on our terms. We can choose to be polite yet still walk away from it. Or we can shrug our shoulders and wish that person good luck with it. However we handle it is our choice.
Because without being sensitive to a guilt-trip... who cares about that demand?
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