Tuesday, April 22, 2014


Shelves are really good to organize stuff, and I happen to need some in my newly built shed. I never had extra storage space around the house, yet now I do have some I fully intend to use it in the most efficient way possible.
The interesting thing about shelves is that they don’t only hold a lot of things, they also serve well whenever we want to shelve something. To put it up because we are essentially done with it, but we don’t want to toss it out just yet. So we shelve it.
On the other hand we can take whatever we hat put there off the shelve when it is needed. We don’t have to reinvent it again, we just take it off the shelve…

It is those connotations that make me think twice about putting those shelves up.

I really don’t intend to shelve things I have no intention of using in the not so far out future. Yet by the very nature of shelves, that is exactly what we tend to do. We use them to store stuff that is no longer needed. Often until we run out of space, which tells us it is time to reevaluate.
In all reality, this is not just true for shelves necessarily; we may well do this with any storage space that has no specific designation.

The question then becomes why we do this.
Why keep things we are truly and definitely done with. Only to come across them over and again; every time deciding that we really don’t want it ~ and then we put it back on the shelve where it may have been for quite some time already. What makes it so hard for us to toss that which we no longer need or want?

Is it the thought that we might, in some far out and unforeseeable  future, still need it ~ and it would be so handy to just be able to take it off the shelve. And wouldn’t it be a shame to have to buy it again while we have it sitting there on the shelve. After all “it is not eating bread”; it doesn’t cost us a dime to just keep it where it is right now. And by the way, it is still perfectly good ~ so why toss it?

Do we ever think about the chance of that particular future happening in our life time? Or how that which we have shelved may be totally outdated by the time we may need it? Or, for that matter, how much more time it would cost to find it on the shelve, rather than to buy it new?

So I guess I’ll be careful what to shelve, as soon as I have them, that is…

Friday, April 18, 2014

Split second

It seems that most life changing things happen in a split second. Whether it is a realization, an awareness, a decision ~ it is in that split second that suddenly we know with an absolute certainty what to do, where to go, how to reinvent ourselves…
In that one tiny moment one could say ‘we see the light’. We gain clarity; we clearly see what decisions to make; what steps to take right there and then.

When this happens to us, those around us may caution us. Tell us to think it through; to sleep on it; to talk it over with a friend (or a professional) before we take action on our sudden decisions.
And while it is true that those very type of decisions have far stretching ramifications and as such are life changing events ~ ‘sleeping on it’ hardly ever will change our minds. In fact, sleeping on it may strengthen our resolve as our reason gets a chance to catch up with our sudden strike of insight.

Not every decision made this way turns out to be a matter of life or death ~ although some are ~ pretty much all split second decisions will turn our personal paths into a different direction. It may prompt us to adopt new values, do new things…
And it almost always will bring us to a point where we feel more alive than we may have felt for some time.

In a sense, that split second decision ~ or perhaps better said ‘split second awareness ~ places us in a position where we can see how we can use our potential to the fullest. It brings us a realization of who we truly are. And with that comes a new perspective on what we are doing with our lives. Where we spend our time and energy. Where we find our happiness and joy and love…
It confronts us if we have been ‘dilli-dallying’ around, not doing much of anything with our talents and capabilities.

That split second can transform us ~ sometimes to a greater extend than years of dedication can.
That split second is when our need, our readiness, and our willingness to take on our life’s purpose all come together with the right timing. It is like when all of those aspects come together a light bulb flashes on, allowing us to see. To really see… To ~ at least on some level ~ even be aware of all the ramifications of our actions, our choices and decisions.

A flash of light that brings enormous clarity where none was before ~ and all of that in a split second…

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

The unexpected

It seems like the unexpected happens a lot easier than whatever it is we expect to happen at any given point during our day. And it is not that those unexpected things are ‘bad’, troublesome, or otherwise annoying; in fact, a lot of those unexpected things turn out to be quite beneficial to us. They are ‘good’ things! It is just that they are, well, unexpected…

Which makes it interesting to start looking at why they are so unexpected.

Often there are two perspectives that make for unexpected events:
We don’t dare dream that something like that will ever happen to us.
We have our expectations of what will happen next, and anything else happening is a surprise to us.

In different ways, neither of those perspectives is helping us cope with the energies we are experiencing in our lives today as the energy does no longer support a step-wise ~ set in concrete ~ planning process that will lead us from A to B to C and so on, to the predictable outcome. The energy we are living in at this point in time is a flow. And the best we can do is to direct that flow as best we can toward our desired outcome.
In other words, we set our goals and move as best we can with the energy around us toward those goals.

This doesn’t mean we are not taking positive steps toward our goals anymore; however it does mean that we would benefit from opening ourselves to possibilities we encounter along the way, and permit ourselves the freedom to explore those possibilities as we are moving in the direction of our set goals.

This implies that we may encounter possibilities that can turn the flow we are in into rapids that lead us to a better, grander goal than we could have imagined! The only thing that could prevent this from happening is to be so stuck on our intended goal and on how to achieve it, that we are not allowing ourselves to benefit from whatever it is that is coming our way unexpectedly…

Now, I am not saying that there are no nasty, problematic surprises we may encounter along the way. But those are not really anything new; we assess them, we handle them ~ and then we move on.
What is new is that it is time to dream big, and then to move toward making our dreams a reality while being open to unexpected, surprising help we may receive along the way.

Friday, April 11, 2014

Help coming your way

Are you one of those people who choose to do pretty much everything themselves? Or would you rather ask for help every step of the way? Whether you are at the first or the second end of the spectrum; in time we all get into a situation that help is being offered no matter what we do or say. The question then becomes whether we are glad that help is coming our way, or if by any chance we are fearing the result of the help that is so kindly being offered…

Because not everybody has the ability to help another person in the way that person needs to be helped. All too often do we help in such a way that we feel would work best for us ~ instead of looking at it from the perspective of the other person that we feel needs our help.
The result can be a situation that is not being experienced as ‘help’ at all. It is a shuffle of things that in time will need to be reshuffled again. As such, help can be something that strikes fear in the hearts of the most brave people. People who dare do anything and take on everything can be brought down by  the thought of being helped in such a way they perceive as going backward.

It is a concept that shows how both helping another person, as well as being the person who accepts the help coming their way is hardly ever as straight forward as it seems. And it can amount to a situation where all those involved feel being unappreciated.

It seems that the key to both helping as well as accepting the help that is being offered lies in totally letting go of our judgement call of how something would be done best, and instead to ask how the other person best can be helped. Very often the other person has a reason to do things a certain way; to organize things in a certain manner. It is not just to be stubborn or even mean-spirited ~ it most likely is because the ultimate result will make them happy…

Sometimes the best way to help is by simply listen to the other person telling you about all the things that are going on. Or to make a pot of tea. Or to be encouraging. While other times some ‘let’s go make it happen-work’ is needed to help get the other person back on track.

Similarly, for the person asking for help at the drop of a hat, it might be best to help them by not picking up the slack but rather by letting them sort it out on their own ~ something that may result in a great sense of accomplishment and self esteem…

So, when help is coming your way, just realize that whichever side you are on, there is nothing simple about it!

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Important things

Has it ever happened to you that in the midst of everything that is going on in your life, you suddenly forget something important? Something that, in quieter times you truly make a priority. Something you value, and even enjoy… And yet, when things get all topsy turvy you never even thought about it. That is, until just that time when you would have done it, when you needed the result of whatever it is that has slipped your mind.
Right at that moment, a sense of panic may set in. This thing that is really important to me should have been done by now, and it isn’t. I haven’t.

When this occurs, one of two things may happen next.
Either we have a problem. We need to scramble to make it work as the important thing that didn’t happen ~ wasn’t done ~ is the hinge pin for a whole host of other things that are tied to it and that may be equally as important to us.
Or life goes on without a hitch. Leaving whatever it is we didn’t do as a choice to do at some later time, or not at all. Just skipping it for now until we find ourselves at a point in our lives that is less hectic, a moment  when we can gain more enjoyment from doing this thing…

Interestingly, whether we have created a problem for ourselves or not has nothing to do with our sense of importance of this thing we really wanted to do; we truly wanted to accomplish. Even though at the surface it seems that when it ends up being a problem in our lives when it didn’t happen it must have been way more important then when there are no discernible consequences of letting the thing that holds importance to us slip.

In other words, the true importance doesn’t lie in the result necessarily; it is part of our experience. If having the experience is important to us; then it is. Independent of the result.

However, it might give us a different perspective on how we plan our lives…

If we plan our lives minute by minute so full that when one thing takes a bit more time ~ or when we find ourselves being just tired and really need a rest ~ a whole range of other things that are dependent on this thing being done cause us trouble, stress, and making our lives even busier; then perhaps we have too much n our plate. Too many balls in the air…
If this is the case, it may be a good idea to revisit our schedule to see what is truly important in our lives.