Friday, April 27, 2012

Shifts

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Over the past 50 years or so, a lot of things that we knew have shifted into something new. Certainties have turned out not being so ‘rock-solid’ as we thought they were...

And this goes for big things and small things alike.

Let’s take our universe.
For most of us, some 50 years ago, our universe was that part of the Milky Way which we could see on a bright night in a spot where the darkness didn’t get broken by street lights or traffic... Since then we have been able to see the most wonderful starscapes thanks to the Hubble Telescope ~ and our universe has never been the same again... Our perception ~ and perhaps even our understanding ~ of the universe has shifted.

When we look at the earth, about 50 years ago the first research results were published that told the world that, if we as humanity would keep on using our resources the way we had been doing since the industrial revolution ~ we would likely run into trouble. And the prognosis at the time wasn’t good ~ even at the time some people would entertain the thought that humanity itself might become the source of its own extinction.
We have learned quite a bit about the changes in the earth in those years ~ or maybe we have come to realize that while things weren’t exactly the way we were told so many years ago, there is something going on with our interaction with the earth that can well cause a change in our climate and subsequently may bring considerable changes to the earth.
We have also shifted our focus from the problem to the solution. Hybrid cars, and even electric cars are now more and more driving the roads. And as humanity we are taking more and more steps to ‘clean up after ourselves’. And while these shifts take time ~ and some may say they take too much time ~ they are steadily happening.

Arguably, the shift in ourselves as unique individuals seems to be just as momentous. While we may have been raised with a certain set of values that says that choosing for ourselves is egotistical ~ in the energy of today it is important to do just that; to choose what is best for ourselves. To make yourself, your wellbeing ~ your balance and sense of inner peace ~ your priority.
Now, I am not saying that in choosing what is best for ourselves we should totally disregard the wellbeing of those around us ~ that might be egotistical. Yet in making that shift to prioritizing yourself you may find that you have a lot more to offer to the world...
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Tuesday, April 24, 2012

We always have choices

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We always have choices. No matter what the situation is we find ourselves in, no matter what age we are ~ we always have choices, even if we cannot see them clearly.

These choices can be quite basic ~ like the choice to tell the truth, to tell a ‘little white lie’, to omit information because it suits us better, to be honest ~ or not.
And while we may not have considered these type of choices as very big or useful choices; in the energy of today they are becoming more and more important. Because it are these kind of choices that help us discover and stand for our values. They will enable us to live according to the values that are truly our own.

This also shows how the choices that are very close to ourselves ~ the choices that have to do with how we present ourselves, what we do with our lives and how we do these things ~ are starting to have an ever greater impact on us and our daily lives in this day and age.

The obstacles we encounter on our personal path are no longer just the situations we find ourselves in, yet more and more often they are how we handle those situations ~ or choose not to handle them...

Therefore, how we choose to work with our emotions becomes crucial.
Are we allowing our emotions to rule our lives? To take over all common sense and dictate what we do and how we do it? Or will we choose to step back from our emotions and handle the situation based on the facts as we see them; according to the truth as we see it? Or perhaps even step back and choose that option which is most beneficial to ourselves?

Being raised with the perspective that choosing what is best for yourself is an egotistical thing, and that it is better to keep in mind what is best for the other people involved ~ this can be somewhat of an dilemma.

On the other hand, what you don’t have for yourself ~ you cannot help anyone else with.
In the old days this was true for basic things like food ~ if you don’t have food for you and your family; there is no food to share with visitors. This is still true today, yet in a slightly different manner. If you are out of balance, you are unable to solve any situation you are involved in in a balanced manner. If you choose to let your emotions ‘run the show’ ~ chances are the situation will heat up in a hurry...

Ultimately, whether we go along with that or step back and choose differently may well be our greatest power...
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Friday, April 20, 2012

What Life Throws at You

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It seems that in this time when polarities are more and more important, life throws things our way that we never thought would be possible. And this can go both ways ~ things that you find on your path can well be better than you could ever conceive of. Yet by the same token they can also lead to obstacles so big that you are not certain you can overcome them...

The first option we have hardly any problem with. We thoroughly enjoy things like winning the lottery, unexpected outings and vacations, dinner invitations and so on.
The second option is on average a lot harder on us. And while we may be aware that we will never find anything on our path that we cannot handle ~ that doesn’t mean that the obstacle we encounter on our path has an easy solution. Often we have to stand up for ourselves in ways we have not done before in order to overcome whatever situation we are finding ourselves in.

As we are asserting ourselves more, our emotions can flare up at the drop of a hat! Often combined with a sense of “How dare they do this to me... I have done nothing wrong”... And pretty soon we can find ourselves fighting the other person, the other party in order to set things right.
It is a fight we want to win. We want to be right. The other person is wrong. And the world ought to recognize that.
It is a spiral that can easily get out of hand.

There are a couple of thing that would be good to remember.
First, it is always a good idea to keep the objective in mind. Do you want to be right? Or do you want to solve the problem?
Second, there is no obstacle that life can throw at you, that you cannot overcome!
Third, and probably most importantly ~ it is hardly ever about the obstacle or problem ~ it is how you handle what life is putting in front of you on your path...

This means that quickly regaining your (emotional) balance can be more important than being right ~ or even more significant than actually solving the problem. Also, taking productive steps to overcome the obstacle you are facing, no matter where those steps are leading you, are very important.
In other words, the (spiritual) lessons you are set up to learn from the situation you are faced with are more important than the situation itself.
Often when you learn those lessons, the problem, obstacle or situation have a tendency to find a resolution all on their own.

What life throws at us ~ whether it is something we consider good or bad ~ is there to make us stronger. To give us the opportunity to empower ourselves.
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Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Empowerment

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There is no sense that can give us a worse feeling than to feel powerless. To not have the power to do, act, react, or affect things that are happening to us is in most cases a traumatic event. It is something that we want to move away from ~ we want to grow, develop life skills and empower ourselves.

It is the healthy thing to do...

So what skills then would we need to feel empowered?
The first one that comes to mind is assertiveness. Having or showing a confident and forceful personality; according to the dictionary. And while being assertive is a good thing, it is also easy to go overboard on that forceful confidence ~ something that can come back to bite you...
An other ‘skill’ that pops up is to be honestly convinced that you yourself are a good person; a person with rights, talents, abilities, and lots of potential to enrich your world and the world around you with. No doubt, no hesitation. You are a good person. Of course that doesn’t mean that you are better than anyone else ~ those other people, each in their own way are also ‘a good person’ until proven otherwise. And then still there is no reason to judge them ~ although you may choose not to be around them.
It seems to me that what we perhaps need most in order to feel empowered are a sense of (inner) balance and (inner) peace...

What comes first  ~ the sense of balance or the sense of peace ~ can be a ‘chicken or egg’ question. The more peaceful you feel, the easier it is to remain balanced. The easier it is to stay balanced ~ the greater the sense of peace one can experience.
Yet once we have found them, it seem that all other things start falling into place...

From a sense of balance, we can be assertive without being ‘pushy’. When we are at peace with ourselves there is indeed no doubt that we are indeed a good person.
It puts us in a state of being where the need to prove that we are good, right, important, and yes, powerful becomes less and less significant. The result is that we feel more empowered.

Other things that tend to take place when this starts happening are that we often find it easier to decide, to make choices that are good for ourselves rather than choices that are just catering to others. And when we really start doing those things that feel totally right to us ~ what the rest of the world thinks about that becomes less and less important. It gives a great sense of liberation!

All the more reason to find that point of peaceful balance inside ourselves...
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Friday, April 13, 2012

Emotions

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Our emotions, the things we feel, play a big part in our lives.
And as we are moving toward an ever greater awareness, it seems that we experience stronger emotions as well. Or perhaps better said; experience our emotions stronger...

It seems that in the energy of today ~ especially with polarities being at play wherever you look ~ our emotions tend to come up fast and furious. One moment everything is calm and balanced and the next moment everything is in turmoil. On top of that, as we are becoming more and more aware of what is happening not only inside of us, yet also in the world around us ~ it becomes easier and easier  to pick up on emotions of other people.
Sometimes this can be very helpful. For instance, when you are in a meeting with someone and you pick up on his or her emotions ~ it can give you information where the other person is coming from. Not just their perspective, but more importantly, their state of mind at that very moment. You can then choose to use this information, for instance to create a more balanced playing field for the meeting at hand.
Other times picking up on the emotions of another person isn’t helpful at all... Like when you are becoming aware of strong emotions like fear or anger from someone who you don’t even know, someone who is just passing by...

Emotions by themselves are not good or bad.
However, the measure in which we allow them to rule our lives can affect our lives in a positive or a negative manner. Many of the emotions one may say are ‘negative’ emotions do have a function. Anger can tell us there is something going on that is not beneficial for us. Fear can alert us to impending danger. Doubt can cause us to weigh our options...
The thing to watch out for is that emotions remain more or less balanced in our lives. So we can get really angry when something happens to us, but we don’t stay angry. We release the anger as soon as we have understood the signal it is giving us, so we can work toward solving the situation in a more balanced way. We can feel enormous fear in a given situation ~ yet we don’t live our lives in fear...

This is also true for so called ‘positive’ emotions.
If we allow a positive emotion to take over our lives, for instance the great sense of fulfillment after having accomplished something; something we may have worked really hard for to get where we wanted to be... The danger is that is we dwell on this success, and keep basking in its glory. When this happens it can get us stuck in a place in life ~ stagnant, without ever realizing that there may well be even greater successes waiting for us, if only we would be willing to take the next step...

Our emotions are a useful part of our lives. As long as we place them in their proper, balanced perspective.
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Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Anger

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Anger is a poisonous fruit.

We all get angry on occasion. Every once in a while something happens in our lives that really sets us off. Whether it is something someone does or says to us, or appointments not being kept ~ whatever it is; most of us seem to have a button somewhere that, when pushed, gets us angry in a heartbeat...

That in itself is not the problem. Anger, like our other emotions, does have a function. It signals that there is something in our lives that we should have a closer look at. Something that we are not in balance with. Something that causes us stress in one way or another.
And yes, whatever it is that causes us to get angry, is definitely about us ourselves. Not about the other person or the situation that instigated our angry outburst...
That may well be the hardest thing to comprehend when we are looking at anger. That it is signaling something about ourselves rather than about something or someone ‘out there’.

For anger to function as a signal, about 30 seconds are enough time for it to come to our awareness ~ for us to realize there is something that needs looking at in ourselves and in our lives.

If our anger takes longer to dissolve, there is usually more to it than just that one situation.

It can be that the instigated anger reminds us of other occurrences of similar situations in which we failed to respond; or didn’t respond assertively ~ leaving us feeling powerless. And suddenly, years later something happens that takes us by surprise, causing us to not react assertively, which can result in a feeling of being powerless. And we get angry. The question is, what are we angry at? Are we angry at that other person? At the situation? Or are we angry at ourselves for the fact that we still are not assertive enough in live to stand our ground when something takes us by surprise?

This cycle is exactly what makes anger such a dangerous emotion.
When we direct our anger at ourselves, whether we are aware of that or not, it can easily start feeding itself. And pretty soon we have talked ourselves down to being a totally worthless person ~ which in itself can make us angry.
This is something that can go on inside of ourselves without the world around us noticing anything about it. We are nice to other people; kind and caring ~ except to ourselves...

Needless to say it is without a doubt our best option to not get into that cycle.
To immediately observe what it is inside ourselves or inside our lives that is being brought to the surface whenever we get angry; the thing our anger is signaling us about
And to take that all important next step: to do something about it.
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Friday, April 6, 2012

Feeling Wronged

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Every once in a while something happens to us that we feel is unjust.
In the very least it is our perception that there was no justification at all for that other person to do what they did unto us. It was totally uncalled for...
When something like that happens it often involves another person, a company, or a group of people that we feel have wronged us. And our initial reaction can be one of ‘rightful indignation’.

If we don’t catch ourselves right in that moment and halt ourselves ~ our reaction can easily progress into frustration and even anger. And those emotions ~ even though they do have a productive function in our lives as well ~ can then start to live a life all their own; eventually turning us into a grumpy, angry, bitter, unhappy person...

Personally, I am convinced that this is not how my live is meant to be.

Which then begs the question as to how to handle those things that happen to us in our daily lives that are ‘totally uncalled for’?

The first thing to look at is if what happens actually is about you, personally, or whether that other person is just reacting to something that went on in his or her life ~ which means it has nothing to do with you. All there is to it is that you were at that place at that time the other person was there too...
If that is the case, there is no use in getting angry about what happened. It is perhaps best to shrug your shoulders, release any ‘righteous indignation’ we may have felt coming up inside ourselves, and be on our way.

The second thing to see is if there is a chance that at least part of what happened is about us. If it is showing us something about our path, about our lives where we can act differently. If this is the case we are often a lot quicker to react with anger, however, that anger is not necessarily about the situation at hand ~ where we may feel actually wronged ~ but it may well be about this other situation in our lives that we perhaps have difficulty handling.
If this is the case, our anger has a ‘signal function’, telling us that there is something in our lives that is waiting for us to observe and be handled. And as a signal function, experiencing about 30 seconds of anger is enough to pick up on what really is the matter. After that we can release the anger we felt and move on with our lives.

When we feel wronged in most cases it is a good idea to thank, forgive and release ~ to thank that nothing major happened, or because of the signal given to us; to forgive in order to break all ties we may have with that situation, and to release that situation...
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Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Easter Eggs

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If there is anything where tradition has integrated itself into the modern, or even virtual world ~ it is the tradition of easter eggs...

The first thing that comes to mind for me is the hunt for the colored chicken eggs my parents had hidden in the garden on easter morning. From a later date are memories of delicious chocolate eggs that replaced the chicken eggs with a much sweeter taste.

Apart from the colored and chocolate eggs, easter eggs have also been known to be true works of art. Whether they were the hand painted empty eggshells of chickens, geese, or even ostriches ~ or the famed bejewelled eggs created by Carl Fabergé... They are unique, surprising keepsakes.

In todays high tech world an easter egg is not always something to be desired as it surprising quality can just as well be an unhappy surprise. Literally it is a hidden surprise, message, or an in-joke programmed into a computer program such as a computer game. A message that can be benign and cute, or that can have been programmed to have disastrous consequences ~ either way it is a surprise.

Traditionally the eggs ~ and especially the easter eggs ~ were seen as new life. A very literal observation as the chicken hatches the eggs and fluffy chicks appear from the shells. A more general description would be that the easter eggs bring new things into our lives, and as such it symbolizes new beginnings. There are some who might even say that everything stems from the egg...

From a symbolic perspective this makes sense as the egg-shape, or the oval, is the symbol for potential. It can relate to our unique, individual potential ~ or the potential of new life. New things in general, or a concentrated effort to bring something we desire into our lives.

Whatever it is ~ it is bound to be creative.
Perhaps not in the common sense of the word in an ‘arts and crafts’ kind of way ~ but when we start bringing new things into our lives we are embarking upon the process of creation which starts with the idea of what it is we desire to create, then the thought follows of what our lives would be like if we had created this... By choice we then take steps to unleash this potential and to allow the new to burst forth from the egg!
And only after its birth can we truly see what it is that we have created ~ which can be quite a surprise in itself... It can be better than we ever imagined ~ or perhaps it doesn’t quite live up to our expectations ~ either way an easter egg in every sense of the word...
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